My shelves are groaning under the weight of cricket autobiographies.
The best – among them ‘Coming Back To Me’ by Marcus Trescothick and Nasser Hussain’s ‘Playing With Fire’ – are well-thumbed.
The others tend to blur together. Tales of pushy parents, age group potential, Test debuts and tearful retirements can almost be written by numbers.
If you’re feeling particularly masochistic, give Michael Vaughan’s ‘A Year In The Sun’ a whirl. Bet you won’t make it to the end without chewing your own face off.
When Jonathan Trott’s new effort appeared on my doormat, I raised a sceptical eyebrow. Would this tell me anything I didn’t already know?
I needn’t have worried. ‘Unguarded’ is a wonderfully honest, brutally painful account of how one of England’s most reliable batsmen decided he could bear the pressure no longer.
As a long-time Warwickshire fan, I have followed Trott’s progress since his county debut but never entirely warmed to him.
Regular readers will know all about my obsession with Trott’s middle order colleague, a chap named Ian Bell.
While Bell flashed, dashed, posed and perished, Trott was the guy at the other end. A solid plodder, quietly getting on with the job.
Most sportsmen and women sit in press conferences and burp out platitudes about how their chosen discipline has come to define their very existence.
“It means the world to me,” they gush. “I’ve worked so hard to get here.”
This is the story of a man who became so consumed by cricket that it swallowed him whole.
Alex Bowden at King Cricket once wrote an amusing piece of fiction in which Trott plays his kids at table-tennis for two whole weeks, relentlessly refuses to let them win a game and “feels immense satisfaction with his performance.”
Reading that again now, it takes on a whole new perspective. Living every second for cricket is all very well when you’re churning out the hundreds. When things started to go wrong, there was nowhere else to turn.
Wisely, he decides not to spend too much time on his childhood and dives straight into the beginnings of what was later diagnosed as situational anxiety.
Unusually for such a self-centered genre, each chapter features contributions from Alastair Cook, Kevin Pietersen, Ashley Giles, Andy Flower, and Trott’s wife Abi.
The other voices only serve to reinforce Trott’s fundamental character traits: decency, modesty, determination and a hard-won sense of self-awareness which was perhaps lacking during his international career.
This piece first appeared at King Cricket.